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To be perfectly honest, I wholeheartedly regret buying a baby sleep program when my first baby was born. Here's what happened...
Let me say something up front: I’m not going to tell you which program I’m talking about (unless maybe you see me in person and ask me really nicely…), but the exact program isn’t the point, anyway.
Here’s what happened.
My first baby was always great with nighttime sleep, but naps… Naps were a different story.
He would go RIGHT to sleep when I laid him down at naptime, and then every day at exactly 42 minutes in, he’d wake up screaming. (And having had more than one kid since then, I can assure you every baby’s cry is different, and this kid did in fact SCREAM.)
I revisited the baby sleep course I had watched in those early newborn days.
I scoured the instructor’s blog and Instagram to see what I was missing.
I tried literally everything, and nothing worked.
Why were naps always a nightmare for us?!
Long story short, I was only left with one conclusion.
The only possible solution (or so I thought) was that there was something wrong with me. I was failing my child somehow. (And I was reinforcing the bad habit of him depending on me for naptime sleep, since every day at 42 minutes, I’d go in and snuggle him for another 1.5-2 hr of sleep.)
That’s it: I was a bad mom.
At some point, though, I realized, thankfully, that this wasn’t actually true. But I hated how long I believed that about myself.
(What I think would have really helped is if the sleep program I followed had added a disclaimer of sorts that every baby is different, and our program might not work for you. But of course who’s gonna make $$ with a disclaimer like that?!)
I also realized that I’d much rather cultivate my own intuition as a parent than rely on someone else for all the “right” answers.
And this is why I’m excited about next Saturday.
Next Monday, I’ve invited Carolina Fuentes (of A Happy Slumber) to talk to us about baby/toddler sleep.
Carolina’s mission is to create a safe space for parents to ask questions and let her guide them through the hardest of days. Families who are ready to stop co-sleeping or bed-sharing will achieve success without crying it out, locking doors, or leaving their child alone in a dark room.
She’s coming to answer questions and share strategies, of course, but she is NOT coming to make you feel bad about yourself as a mom. The goal of our time together is for Carolina to offer you some practical strategies and guide you through balancing those strategies with what your gut tells you when it comes to baby sleep.
Please do join us. You’ll be glad you did.
